"Mummy I want chocolate cake for breakfast tomorrow " I bet you do Maggie! "I don't like normal breakfast anymore!" Well you seem to eat all of your breakfast at nursery Maggie?? "They have different cereal at nursery!" Different? What do you mean different? "They get it from London!" #londoncereal #weboflies #thanksforcoming #dangerousdave #getwhatyouaregiven

"Mummy I have taken a really nice selfie of us" Oh lovely let's have a look... #cuedisappointment  #bitofwarningnexttime #framer

"Mags you've been really lovely today...you seem back to your old self!" Yeah...im not sure who that girl was that's been living in our house for the last few weeks do you Mummy? "Which girl Maggie?" You know...the other girl called Maggie with the dodgy behaviour? Maybe we should throw her into prison! #ohTHATgirl #youshouldhavesaid... Continue Reading →

When I said "Stop playing football next to my Christmas Tree" for the 15th time.... What I actually meant was... Please bicycle-kick yourself in the eye and cry for half an hour when we already don't have much time....giving yourself a nice black eye...on the day of your school play! #ffs #boys #stopkickingeverythinglikeafootball #clumsychild

Sat behind some absolute oxygen thief in the car park.. .completely blocking everyone from getting out whilst she waits for the parking space of someone who is still in the queue in Tescos... I somehow manage to to hold in all of the expletives and say "is this woman having a laugh??"... A little voice... Continue Reading →

This boy..... He has left 36 school jumpers at school...... But it's ok because he's managed to bring home a cardigan belonging to a girl that he's never heard of! #boys #thanksforyourhelp #illjustbuyyouanewjumpereverydayshalli?

"Mummy.. . Open your mouth really really wide" Why Mags? "I'm looking for something!" What are you looking for??? "Your lungs!!" #obvs #lungstonsilswhatever

"Mummy I'm sorry that I ran away from you earlier" You must never do that again Maggie.. .Mummy was very worried! "Sssh Mummy...I thought we've finished with that conversation!" #youmayhavedone #sorrytothebone #dangerousdave

How's your runny nose been today Mags? "Well I didn't need a tissue!" Oh good so it's getting better? "No...i just used my coat sleeve!" #great #askastupidquestion  #honestyisnotalwaysthebestpolicy #ferrell #dangerousdave 

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