"Mummy I've got a great idea to help you with mine and Seth's behaviour!!" Go on, share the wealth...i need all the help i can get! "Well i was thinking... if you just give us each 7 chances, and then if no luck you can just talk to our teachers!" #simpleasthat #7chanceswilllastuntilabout8am #oryoucouldjustdoasyourtoldthefirsttime #novelidea #dangerousdave

"Maggie you need to start talking nicely to Mummy!"... Yeah you're right Mum otherwise people will think 'Who is that weird woman letting her kid talk to her like that!?' #ffs #weirdwomanindeed #sheisalwaystenstepsahead #dangerousdave #beast #whatdoidowiththis

First day off in half term... It is 9.04am.... I am thinking of running away... Already had row number 1 about watching the 300th episode of the same mega-irritating YouTube family with the Mum who's voice only dogs can hear! Now we have moved on to the classic 'I am going to cry and sob... Continue Reading →

She has bossed me around since the second she hs opened her eyes.... I say "Maggie...how bossy are you going to be when you have children of your own??"... Really bossy Mum...I'm going to say "Go away you horrible kids!!!" #nowords #shesnotjoking #shesnotsorry #sherunsatightship #dangerousdave

When its been around 45 mintues watching him painfully attempt to put on one of his socks.... And you hear yourself say... "Keep going Seth...you're doing really well...put the other sock on!" ***You aren't doing really well, you are doing pretty terribly if we are honest, you will not survive in the real world!!!*** #mumencouragement... Continue Reading →

Nice little visit from Santa's Sleigh on our street.... 'What's your name little boy?' Seth.... 'What would you like for Christmas?' An x box.... #standardchat 'What is your name little girl?'... Rudolph!!!! 'What would you like for Christmas Rudolph??'... Everything!!! ****cue hilarious laughing at her own jokes**** #dangerousdave #youneverknowwhatscomingnext #oneonherown

"Mummy we need to pay school for the naked children tomorrow!"..... Which naked children?????.... "You know...the children that need some more clothes!".... Oh...you mean Children in Need??? "Yes thats what i said Mummy!" #thankgodforthat #phew #childreninneed #dangerousdave #themindboggles

She wants a new Mummy because i will only let her have 1 ice cream.. But then she insists on sleeping in my jumper #youwinsomeyoulosesome #dangerousdave

"Mummy...under your arms is soooooo gooey!"..... "Ah cool...can i feel your gooey arm Mum??" #ohgood #thatwillbefatthen #bingowings #joy #winningatlife #flappinginthewind #whoneedsslime #killmenow

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